Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Only 9 days until I go back to Exeter...

I'm not going to write much. I will when I get back. Or not. I have exams 2 weeks after and may be quite busy. Anyway, these are a couple of photos worth sharing.

Saturday, 3 December 2011

Subtle clues when a party is lame

After preparing the bread dough, I went to an "international party" which took place at the university club. I only went because I got a free ticket after answering a questionnaire. I should have known that was the first clue...
When I arrived there at 11pm, there was the security in front of the building chatting, I went past them, went to the counter and handed my free ticket, and the girl said to who appeared to be hosting the party, "what do I do with this?" Second clue. I was like "why doesn't she know...?" and I asked if there is anyone in the place. The host said, "yeah there's plenty of people in there!!" He escorted me in there. There were two men drinking. Three women sort of dancing on the floor. One DJ miserably providing music. On the flier, I remembered the DJ was a London DJ. When I saw the state of the party, I stopped and thought what exactly was a London DJ... He's probably a regular DJ who just happens to come from London.

Anyway, this is the short conversation between me and the host.
Me "there's no one here..."
Host "People will come in 20 minutes! It's only 10 o'clock. Just wait and see!"
Me "It's not 10. It's already 11."
Host "Well, people are coming in 20 minutes. Do you want anything to drink?"
Me "No, I think I'll go to Arena (biggest club in the city.). My classmates will be there. (I knew this because they asked me if I was coming earlier, to which I answered "I'm going to another party.")"
Host "You'll have a better time here than at Arena. Here, I'll buy you a drink. (You know he's desperate if the host buys you a drink)"
Me "uhhh ok..."

So I sat there awkwardly with the two men drinking alchopop. Finished the bottle, walked out ASAP. Went directly to Arena. Met my classmates and had an awesome time until I came home at 4am. I love the Singaporean girls so much. They are sooo hot... *drools*

Olive Bread

Last night, I made oilive bread. Well, not until the baking part. I had to leave it in the fridge to rise overnight. I baked it this morning and look how it turned out!

I'm really satisfied with this. I put 50ml of vegetable oil which wasn't in the recipe because I asked my mum why my bread was always crumbly and she suggested to add oil. The texture turned out professiounal. The only thing with this is that, because it already has the olive taste, it doesn't go well with jam.

Slow food: Fish Pie and Chicolate tart!!!

Thursday night, I went to the fish night at the slow food society for the first time. It was actually at one of the member(Lauren)'s house. Their kitchen was sooooo clean and tidy... I envy her!!! The impression of the society was I feel more at ease than in the LGBTQ. We have a common interest:food. Whereas in LGBTQ, it's more like common characteristic. The people at LGBTQ and slow food are both really nice but I feel I can get into the conversation with the slow food people.

The menu was Fish Pie and Bitter Chocolate Tart. Both were superbly delish!!
I arrived at Lauren's house at 6pm right after my class. Lauren and the chef (James isn't a university student. He owns a restaurant, I think. I don't know how come he's involved in this society but he's a really nice person.) as talking in the kitchen. Them and 2 other people had gone to the fish market that morning to buy fish for the dinner. It turned out that they got the fish for free!! They got 4 types of fish (salmon and I don't remember the name of the others but they were white fish.)

First of all James cut off the skin of the fish. I wanted to fry the skin but I just kept quiet. Shoulda said something. Throwing away that much skin was such a waste!! They took turns to cut it. I didn't cut any because the patch on my hand that I burnt while I was baking bread last week was getting white and gross and I had band-aid on. (What an excuse! It still hasn't healed but is getting better.)

Then more people arrived at the house. Steph made white sauce which I helped to stir. Then we added the fish into the white sauce and I stirred until the fish was cooked. James put lime zest and lemon juice into this sauce which made the taste so much better. The sauce was put out into a dish and was left to cool.

Vish, an Indian guy, peeled potatoes and this was made into a mash. Technique I learnt from James was that if you whisk the mash, it will taste lighter. After the mash was ready, it was put in top of the fish white sauce.
Meanwhile, Lauren was preparing the chocolate tart. 70% cacao chocolate 400g!!!!Super rich and super yummy!

Lauren or James had already prepared the pie dough and it was in the fridge in plastic wrap. Lauren spread this out and put it on the pie tin. This was baked in the oven for a shirt while. Another technique from Vish is if you put egg yolk in the pie crust, it won't get soggy after you pour the filling.
Chocolate, butter and 2 eggs were combined in a pot and this was poured into the crust. The crust came out with the side of it melting to the bottom. Lauren is trying to master making pies because she wants to make it when she goes home for Christmas. Another failure for her!
Now both the fish pie and chocolate tart were in the oven. So now it was time for veg. James cut cauliflowers and cabbage and boiled it. Simple.
And this is what it looked like when everything was finished. Magnificent!

I want to try making the chocolate tart when I have a pie tin!!! Or maybe I could make it with my cake tin.

Thursday, 1 December 2011

Chocolate Cake success!!! and choir

On Sunday, Nancy and I made the same chocolate cake that I'd already made twice. And it was an absolute success. It was better than the previous two. The sponge was not dry, not too sweet, not too thin. Just right. With the whipped cream and chocolate leafs, the sweetness was just perfect.

The chocolate leafs were very good too. I'd found a type of leaf that had a similar smell to sansho (Japanese pepper) and that gave the chocolate a good smell. And they all peeled off from the real leafs so I was glad.

There was an accident while trying to make the choco leafs, though. I put the cooking chocolate in the bowl and made a water bath. That part was fine. Then Nancy started to show off her iPad and we started to play with it. Which you shouldn't keep your mind off the food while you are cooking. And when I noticed the sound of water boiling, it was too late. Nancy had, for some unknown reason, put a lid on the water bath and water had filled up the bowl of chocolate!
The problem was solved by pouring out the water and leaving the excess water to evaporate. But lesson learnt: concentrate when you are cooking.
Me looking really satisfied (which I was).

I just came back from a concert (free of course, I wouldn't pay money just to listen to choir). Someone in the LGBTQ promoted it on their facebook page because it was something to do with AIDS. The place it was held was literally 1 minute's walk from my room so I went, although it started at 11pm.
It was like waiting at the dermatologist and listening to the BGM. It didn't give me goosebumps at all. That's my standard for determining if classical music (or any other boring music) is good: whether or not it gives me goosebumps. This time, it didn't.
And I know I'm not the only person who thought so because the old man who left first (I left second) when the concert finished said "That was horrible."
I could have said, "I know, right!?" But I didn't. :P

Monday, 28 November 2011

Rice, turnip, cauliflower bake

Tonight's dinner.
Cup up 1 turnip in pieces. Use 4 leafs and flowers of cauliflower. Boil 420ml water and add beef stock to dissolve. Mix turnip, cauliflower and 1/3 beef stock into baking dish and out it in oven for 10 mins at around 170C. Add pudding rice into beef stock and wait 10 mins. Take out baking dish and add rest of beef stock and rice and stir so that rice is completely under the water. put 3 eggs on top with cheddar cheese. Bake in oven at 150C for 45-50 mins.

As well as making this, I made Average Betty's Stop Drop Dinner Rolls. I don't like Average Betty's videos because there's too much annoying extra bits unrelated to the recipe but this looked good.

As I was making this bread, I thought the best part of baking bread is when you punch out the gas that the yeast produces during resting time. It's like, "puff!" It's very comforting to touch the soft dough that doesn't stick to your hands. :) I love it. I wish I could be a baker or something.
I've been thinking that egg wash is a cool technique so I wanted to try for these rolls. But I'd used all the eggs for the bake above. So I experimented with fake butter, milk, and vegetable oil. None of them were a good idea. The butter was the worst. It made the dough to shrink. All the blowing up (!) was ruined and it shrunk right after I gently smeared butter. Milk had a similar effect as egg wash but making the surface shiny but this made the dough to shrink as well. Vegetable changed the texture of the surface but not much difference. Instead of adding meaningless calories, not putting anything on the surface kept the puffedupness and looks good. I'm trying to improve my "make food look good as well as taste good" skills so this experiment was a good try. I learn something every time I cook something. So fun! :)

Saturday, 26 November 2011

Kitchen situation

This morning, I went to check how the kitchen was messed up.

Practically as the cleaners left it.
Hobs clean.
Sink clean.
Dish rack tidy.
Table wiped. (I wiped after I did my bread knots.)

After (Today at 9:30am...Still the same state. As if anyone is going to clean that shit up):
Hob left TURNED ON at lowest heat. (Dangerous!!)
Chewing gum on window sill.
Greasy unwashed frying pan.
Unwashed pots left in sink.
Table with crumbs and grease.
pieces of bread on surfaces.
2 slices of bread on cupboard.

I am 99.999% sure that the guy isn't going to clean it up before Monday. And I'm equally sure no one (including myself) is going to do it either. If this state is left like this until Monday, the cleaners are going to give us another note.

I sent an email to the welfare officer as she told me to let her know if this situation continues. She'll probably send the guy a formal letter to get his act together. Wonder what will happen next...

Brussel sprout Soup

It doesn't look appetising but it does taste good. It went really well with yesterday's bread knots! :D
1 tbsp vegetable oil
2 cloves garlic
1 onion
2 green peppers (I regret adding this. It made the soup bitter.)
1 turnip
10~ brussel sprouts
5 olives (didn't really need it but I'm too excited with this stuff!!)
1 beef stock

Today, I did quite a lot of shopping. I went to the Real Food Store that I discovered through the university's Slow Food Society. I've never been to any of their socials, nor have I paid the society fee (5.00 pounds), but I just check what's going on through facebook. They are having a fish night on Thursday and I'm thinking of going.

The Real Food Store is a small shop that sells bread, veg, some meat and other products and there's a cafe on the first floor. This was the first time I went and I thought it was nice that customers were chatting with the shop assistants. One shop assistant even asked me if I was ok! I ended up buying cauliflower, green peppers, onions, potatoes and turnips. I thought of buying coconut milk because I watched how to make Thai green curry and they use a lot of coconut milk. But I decided to go to tesco and see their price. Another reason I didn't but it was because I didn't want to buy too much that I can't finish the veg off before it goes bad. Not that that has ever happened.

I was planning to put cauliflower in the soup but the brussel sprouts that I didn't eat for lunch ended up enough so I left it out. Oh maybe I could make Thai green curry with it!! I'll wait until Monday to see the price of coconut milk at RFS. Should have jotted that down.

Tomorrow, I'm going to make another chocolate cake with Nancy. I don't want to be misleading but I thought it might be nice if I spent time with her (I don't know if she still likes me though). Also, it will be a good opportunity to bake without getting fat because someone else will be eating most of the cake (that's the main reason lol).

Friday, 25 November 2011

Green Tea Cupcakes & Bread Knots!

So today is Friday... You know what that means... BAKING DAY!!!

I wasn't intending to make cupcakes until this afternoon. I just thought, "what would it taste like if I added green tea to cupcake batter?" So I made it right after I came back from class. (I had to go to Tesco to buy flour and other stuff which I'll write about later in this post.)

The hardest part of making these was when I ground the tea leaves. I have a green tea leaf mill and I didn't know how much I needed for this so I kept grinding until I thought was enough. It took about 5-10 mins just for grinding. I had to have several rests because my arms hurt. :P

Anyway, I added green tea to the flour/sugar/salt mixture until it looked light green, then added egg,milk and oil, put the batter into silicone cupcake cups (bought @ Poundland) (very nice products; you don't have to put oil or anything because it doesn't stick and you can use it over and over again.), put some toppings I thought might be good, (in the photo below from top right: sunflower seeds, not ground green tea, no topping, oats, drinking cocoa, pumpkin seeds) and baked them. All the toppings were delicious (yes I ate all of the ones with toppings.) But cocoa and oats and sesame seeds were especially good.
 Here is the same batter baked in honey jar. My Singaporean classmate asked me if I knew about "brandied cherry cupcakes" and I googled it later and found that it was cupcakes baked in jars. So I tried that with my honey jar. It turned out a bit messy because the batter touched the sides of the jar and it doesn't look as elegant as the one I googled but its a similar thing, I think. (It just dawned on me that the reason why I got the urge to make cupcakes was because my class mate asked about this.)

 Here are more of the same cupcakes. No topping.

 After the cupcakes, I began my bread baking, which I was initially intending to do. I've been watching video podcasts called Daily Bread by Harwood Podcast network and this one seemed easy and pretty so I decided to make this one today. This was the first time to actually KNEAD a bead with my hands. The last time, I just used my spoon. I liked the feel of kneading the bread because the dough was near body temperature (because yeast doesn't activate properly if you use cold water). It was sort of an intimate moment. And the dough turned out good, unlike last time when I had to keep adding flour because I didn't know how much 1 cup of flour was in grams.
The only thing that was a problem was that I don't have a big enough baking tray to put all 16 knots on. So I had to bake 8 at a time. It turned out fine in the end. I think I'll go to Poundland tomorrow to buy another baking tray. Then I can leave one in the kitchen so that others can use it when they use the oven. Right now, no one is clever enough to do so and the oven is dirty as hell.

I finished all my bread baking just in time for the group of Azerbaijanis (the ones who mess up the kitchen every week.) to come in. I reported them to the welfare officer on Monday and she said she'll tell the resident tutor to talk to him firmly (that will be the 3rd time) and if that doesn't work, I'll have to tell her again. Wonder how the kitchen will look like tomorrow morning.

I've been eating up most of the food on my section of the fridge this week. This is because I wanted to clean out my place. The fridge was starting to smell like public toilets. Only sauces and a bag of brussel sprouts were left today. I wiped out my part and put in the stuff I bought from tesco. I didn't buy any veg because I discovered there is a "real food shop" and I want to try the veg there. I'll go to that shop this weekend.
Stuff I bought from tesco were; milk, flour, low fat fake-butter (substitute for butter when baking/cooking) green olives (I want to bake Olive Bread sometime in the near future) and paprika.
For tonight's dinner, I had spaghetti. Just spaghetti, vegetable oil, cheddar cheese and 3 olives. This is because I didn't want to use my brussel sprouts (they are for my lunch tomorrow) and I wanted to try the olives.
Let me tell you, olives were invented by Gaga. (I'm not going to say god because I don't believe in that shit) They are absolutely delish! Even though I bought the cheapest tesco ones (79p), they taste real good. I remember not liking them when I was little but now that I'm appreciating many new foods, I think they are really nice. I even tried kimchi at my Korean friends' house last week and found it good.
I think I'm falling love with food. :) <3

Sunday, 20 November 2011

Failed/successful chocolate cake + first ever bread

 Above is a chocolate cake I made on Friday night and failed. The reason it failed was because it was supposed to be baked in two separate dishes and made into a layer but because I only have one cake dish, I put all the batter at once and so it was still not baked after the time on the recipe. So left it in the oven longer (about 50 mins in total) until the inside was completely cooked. This resulted in a really uneven texture and super hard outside AND dry on the inside. It was embarrassing because I was planning to take this to the international Night where we danced Soranbushi. This event was for charity at a church and the entry fee was 5.00 and there was no way I was going to pay 5 quid and I heard you don't have to pay if you bring in some food so I took the opportunity to have fun baking. The event ended up with the church people singing modern-pop sounding songs which included words such as "You" and "God" and "Your love is more than enough" and "You'll never ever leave me" and they encouraged us to stand up and dance, which most people did. I did stand up and clap at first but the songs became more and more Christian and it felt like a complete advertisement so I stopped clapping and sat down. I was like, "fuck that I'm not falling for that trap."
Anyway, another reason the cake was a fail was that because I'm a cheap ass and I bought single cream (20p cheaper than double cream), the cream didn't whip. I whipped and whipped for 10 minutes and it didn't change at all. So I just poured it over the top and it looked like a pile of cow shit topped with bird shit.
Today, my Korean friends were going to cook us Korean food so I decided to bake another chocolate cake. This time, learning from the previous one, I baked twice and used double cream. I took the two thin cakes to the Korean friends' house and put it together just before eating. Seeing the below photo on facebook, my mum thought I whipped the cream too much but it was OK. ...At least better than yesterday. But there's still room for improvement.
The chocolate leaves were a success. I picked leaves when I came back from class on Friday. Melted 100g of cooking chocolate from tesco together with "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. Light" (cheap ass and low cal) poured the chocolate on the surface of the washed and dried leaves (should have been the back of the leaves) and put in freezer. The leaves come off easily when they are nicely cooled.
 As I still had a few hours before going to the Korean friends' house, I made a loaf of bread from scratch for the first time in my life. It came out good and it tastes nice but the texture is like unsweet cake. The reason for failure was probably because I didn't know how much 2.25 cups were and kept adding flour as i stirred in the bowl. I didn't knead it in the table because I don't trust the table to be clean although I wiped it before I started cooking. I also didn't use bread flour (used self raising flour) and baking soda (used baking powder). I also didn't use cornmeal because I didn't have it. I used flour instead but wasn't a good idea because it didn't spread, Should have just smeared butter (or rather, "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. Light").
But being the first time to bake a bread, I think it's pretty good.

Friday, 18 November 2011

Soft Pretzels!!

Made on Thurday afternoon-night. Had to leave it to rise for 4 hours instead of 1 because i had class and it definitely would have been better if it was only 1 hour. but it turned out ok.
I made it using this recipe.

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Rice and tomato etc bake

Looks the same as before but this time the ingredients are (from the bottom):
Vegetable oil
1 clove of sliced garlic
Pudding Rice (washed and drained)
milk until rice is covered
1/3 can of tomato evenly spread out
1 mushroom, sliced
1 green pepper
1 can of 4 sardines cut in half
salt again
Mild cheddar
dried parsley on top

In the oven at 190C for 45 mins.

It was ok but the rice was partially undercooked. Would have been better if I cooked it longer with a bit more salt and milk.

Monday, 14 November 2011

sort-of-but-not-really lasagna

Ingredients from the bottom:
1 sliced clove of garlic
veg oil

1 whole courgette cut into quarters
3/4 carrot

1/2 can of tomato
probably 40g of spaghetti broken in half
milk until spag is covered
1/2 can of tomato
1/2 can of garden peas

2 mushrooms cut in 1/8s
grated mild cheddar
dried basil on top

baked in oven at 190C for 45-mins
It's basically a bunch of veg and a bit of cheese on top. Super healthy.
I also tried to make ice cream last night but it turned out to be really icy. What it said in the cookbook was true - "making ice cream need trial and error."
drinking chocolate powder
super intense beating

Saturday, 12 November 2011

Just had a taste of this apple cake...

and it's perfect!! The sourness of the apple and the sweetness of the sponge is just amazing! This is my first time making it and I'm very satisfied with it. The sponge is not too dry, not too wet, just right. The only thing that would have made it better is I could have put butter on the cake tin so that it doesn't stick to it so much. Other than that, I'm proud of it!!!! :)
Side view

Baking Photos

I've been doing a lot of creative stuff...and I LOVE it. Can't believe I didn't help my mum so often at home. I'm looking forward to going home for Christmas and baking something at a clean kitchen. A dirty kitchen really puts me off.Also, as I bought oats for the flapjacks, I tried porridge for the first time. I liked it! My dad used to eat porridge for breakfast occasionally and mum didn't like it so I presumed that I don't like it either. But I do. The same thing with bananas. Mum doesn't like bananas so I thought I won't like them but I do. The power of a mother........
I'm planning to make a chocolate cake next week... Can't wait!!
Double layer cheese cake. Bottom layer:cream cheese, egg, sugar. Top layer: cream, yogurt, sugar. crust: digestive biscuits, butter) I put jam after I baked the bottom layer before pouring the top. This emphasised the double layerness.
This is what it looked like from above. I'm so artistic!!!
50 mini (yes they were very small) cupcakes that I took to the Halloween night out with the LGBTQ people. Not sure if they enjoyed it though. They were drinking beer.
Crapes (I ate it with blackberry jam that I used in the cheese cake an yogurt)

Raisin cookies. I love making cookies... but hate eating them because I eat too much!

Flapjacks that I made on Thursday night. I made them because the lunch break on Fridays are from 2pm and I get really hungry by then. I shared them with my classmates. One guy said, "whoever you marry is really lucky." I thought that was a great complement. :)
Apple cake I made this evening. It's still cooling on my bed. (I don't want to let it cool in the kitchen because you never know what goes on in there if I'm not around...)

Instant(ish) apple crumble that I made with the left over apple. I need to work on the crumble bit. it's not like the one my mum makes.)

Wednesday, 26 October 2011


On Sunday, i made cookies and this weekend, I'm planning to make a cheese cake. I bought a cake tin the other day for the cheese cake.
I enjoy cooking because it's fun to do and rewarding. Other people are happy too. The only problem is eating too much.
I know it's a bit burnt. The taste was ok though.

Tuesday, 18 October 2011

Went to the student counselling service...

...i don't think it's my thing. I don't like Telling personal stuff to a complete stranger. I like saying it to someone who already knows who the hell I am. I don't want to explain everything and the other person assumes additional info. And the lady smelled of smoke. I don't want to share my stuff with people who smoke. I'll get the hell out of the system ASAP.

Monday, 17 October 2011

What I really miss right now:

  • Spoken Japanese
  • Onigiri from 7 Eleven
  • Ridiculous TV programmes
  • News presenters
  • Songs they play at Aeon
  • All the people at Aeon
  • Fish
  • Real Japanese rice
  • my mum's food
  • my mum
  • my dad
  • my room
  • Tsukuba
  • Doho Park
  • Chuo Park
  • the library
  • all the Japanese words
  • random Japanese books in bookshops
  • the feeling of Japaneseness (un-Europeness)
  • school albums (elementary/junior high/ high school)
  • my mum's bread

Saturday, 15 October 2011

Friday, 14 October 2011

Story from the Song and Story Night

It was the second S&S night and I enjoyed it as the first time. David is such a good story teller/entertainer. The first story really made an impression to me so I'll write it here so that I don't forget it.

March always wore a hat. It was because he had a big secret that even his wife didn't know about. He had unusual ears. He had horse ears. But there was one person who he couldn't hide hide his secret. ----The hair dresser.
One day, March went to the hair dresser. When the hair dresser saw his ears, he exclaimed "what...? how....?!" March told him, "You must tell no one or I will kill you." The hair dresser said, "I will tell no one."
So the hair dresser was to keep a secret. But hair dressers are people who like to talk. To gossip. But the hair dresser kept his promise.
However, keeping a secret started to become a burden for him. He became ill and weak because of it.
The hairdresser went to the doctor about it. The doctor asked him, "what it the secret? I cannot help you if you don't tell me the secret." The hairdresser said, "I can't tell you. It's a secret." The doctor replied, "Well, if you don't tell someone, you will die soon."
The hairdresser went away. He went out among the forest and to a meadow. He got on his hands knees and spoke to the earth. "March has horse ears. Long ears he has."

This story takes place at the time of King Arthur. One day when the king visited this city. The piper played his pipe. This pipe was a new pipe made from a plant collected from near the meadow. As he played his pipe, the pipe began to sing. It sang, "March has horse ears . Long ears he has."
The king asked "March, is this true?" March's face became bright red and said, "No it is not true." King Arthur told him to take off his hat. He could not disobey the king. He took off his hat. Out came the long horse ears. King Arthur exclaimed "What great ears! Those are the best ears I have ever seen! Those are more magnificent than my horse's ears."
All the people admired March's ears. March became proud of his ears and never wore his hat to hide then again.


As I listened to this story, it made me think how nice it would be to be out and not keep everything a secret. Then again, even if I'm out, I wouldn't be exactly "out and proud" because I'm rarely proud of being trans. Because being trans sucks ass. I'd rather have horse ears than be trans.

Monday, 10 October 2011

Cool website
I found it through an app by this academy. I thought it was worth sharing.

Sunday, 9 October 2011

Biology revision

I revised biology yesterday and struggling to remember all these long biological words and here is my explanation of what I remember from yesterday. At least, this is how I understood it.

There are two types of cells; Eup----- cells have a nucleus and P---- cells don't have it. The latter cell is more simple than Eup----- cells.
In the nucleus, there is a nucliolus which makes ridosomes. The nucleus has and envelope membrane which means it has two membranes that surrounds it. Endoplasm reticulum is connected to the nucleus. There are two types of endoplasm reticulum; rough endoplasm reticulum (RER) and smooth rendoplasm reticulum (SER). RER makes protein that is pinched off and taken to the golgi body to be synthesised into another chemical so that it can be used in other parts of the body. SER makes lipids and steroids. The difference between RER and SER is that RER has ribosomes around it which makes it look rough. SER doesn't have ribosomes so it looks smooth. Endoplasm reticulum has only one membrane.
Mitochondria has double membranes. Mitochondria contains strands of DNA and some ribosomes. Inside of a mitochondrion, there is a fluid called matrix.
Lysosomes contain a digestive substance and it is used to digest bacteria when a white blood cell contains the bacteria in a vesicle, or when the cell needs to self destruct, or when other cells need to be destroyed.
Cytoskeleton is a cobwebby thing that is made of protein that is used to put all the organelles in place and keep the cell in shape.
Ribosomes are small vesicles and the function is to produce protein?
The cell membrane allows some substances to pass through and some not.

that's all I can remember.
Now I'll check for mistakes...

The cell that has a nucleus is called an Eukaryotic cell.
The cell that doesn't have a nucleus is called a Prokaryotic cell.
There is a Nucleolus in the nucleus. ER is Endoplasmic reticulum.
The area inside the endoplasmic reticulum is called cisterna.
The fluid inside a cell is called cytoplasm.

Friday, 7 October 2011

Last friday night & first week of class

There was a night out with the LGBTQ group last friday night. We got together at the Ram (a bar run by the student's guild (Exeter's student's union)) at 8 pm, then walked down to another bar, then went to the Vaults (local gay bar) at 11pm. I didn't drink anything at the first two places but I had one glass of orange juice at Vaults. What else did I do? Well, I danced for 2.5 hours straight! (...or rather, 2.5 hours gay.) I even danced with 2 random fat gay girls. It was crazzzzyyyyy! I had a lot of fun! I came back at almost 3 am. Oh and I remember eating 6 bananas that day. I think that was why I was able to dance for such a long time.

This week, the class actually started. The subjects are pretty boring; writing, listening and speaking, reading and study skills, maths and biology.

One thing I can say is the maths teacher is rubbish. (That's what the japanese/french guy said.)

Surprisingly, I think I'm going to enjoy biology. Although the new vocabulary is overwhelming, the teacher is nice and it's actually interesting. Knowing how the body works is really interesting for me, especially now that I'm really into knowing more about nutrition. I even borrowed a book from the library about nutrition. I'm taking notes about each elements such as vitamin A,C, B, and other minerals. I want to get the note taking done and focus on biology.

Oh and I also became the person for Student Staff Liaison Committee for foundation science. Each course apparently has to have one person to represent the course. And I became the person. The reason was that the teacher told us it would look good on my CV and other people didn't want to do it. I thought I might as well take responsibility if I like to boss around the people who use our kitchen, you know?

Annnndddd I caught a cold on Monday and haven't feeling the best this week. Which is why I can't go partying with the LGBTQ people tonight. I had to carry a box of tissues all week and I had fever on Tuesday night. That's always how my colds go. Runny nose -> fever -> cough. I'm in the last phase now. I have a sore throat. I'll take it slow this weekend.

Aaaaannnnnnddddd we had a fire alarm last night (like every night). Last night was cold. I was talking with Lina (my former class mate. Chinese girl.) that "it's really cold tonight, aren't you cold?" I told Lina that I've been ill this week. And somehow I managed to hug her. I wondered why I was able to do that because I usually avoid physical contact with anyone other than a family member. And it was nice. After the fire alarm stopped and we went inside, Lina brought me a Chinese medicine for my cold and we talked in the kitchen for a while. AND today, she cooked me dinner! She said she made it because she thought I might not want to cook if I'm sick. I was already in the middle of making my dinner --- spaghetti. I gave her half of my spag. I liked her dinner but I was stuffed by the time I had my dinner and her's. She's really nice. And thank Gaga she already has a boyfriend. No drama attached.

Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Need to learn to give up...

One of them bought a 4 pint bottle of milk. And they bought 3 of them. 12 pints of milk... Really?
What's more, the same person occupied one third of the fridge! I felt really sorry for the guy who had to put his food in other spaces.
And as for the russian chick, I know she was in her room at the time of the flat meeting. She didn't attend. It's absolutely hopeless.

My new English class is completely different than my previous class. Theres hardly any Chinese people. What I mean by that is there's one girl from Hong Kong and I'm not sure if that's exactly Chinese.
There's students from: Nigeria, Turkey, Oman, Sri Lanka, Hong Kong, Singapore, Malaysia, and half French half Japanese guy.
These people are 16-23 years old. One Nigerian guy asked, who old are you and later, he revealed that he's 16. He look like he's 28 or something. He's big and macho. Another Turkish guy asked me the same question. He was an average looking guy. He has facial hair like a regular guy. He's 18... The same as me. The half french half Japanese guy is short but has a very deep voice. He's also 18.


Saturday, 1 October 2011

How can someone...

...who is 20 years old not know how to open a can?

Here is a step by step way to open a can:
  1. Go to the kitchen.
  2. Open the drawer and get the can opener.
  3. figure out how to use the can opener.
  4. Open the can.
Pretty simple, right?

Friday, 30 September 2011

The answer to a simple question can't be more confusing

Today, I met someone very interesting. I asked her where she was from. I thought she was Chinese like all the other Asians. How wrong was I!?
Her dad is British. Her mum is half Chinese, half Filipino. She was born in America. But she has been living in Dubai for the last 10 years. She has a British passport. Her first language is English and she speaks American English. She also knows Italian, French, Latin, Arabic.
And she can't answer "I'm British" because she looks Chinese. No one would believe her. Including myself. :P
But we both agreed that it's annoying when everyone says "really?" when I say "I'm Japanese" and she says "I'm British."

Thursday, 29 September 2011

Bitching about the new residents

I probably wrote the same exact thing when I first came here with the previous residents but I need to write it again.

I can't imagine why anyone who is older than 15 wouldn't know how to successfully do the dishes and put them on the rack next to the sink. I mean, it's the simplest house hold action. And can't they figure out to put the dry dishes back to the cupboard to make space to put new wet dishes? Don't they have any piece of common sense??????????????? It's astonishing how they don't. Or maybe I'm too mature. Or maybe I'm not tolerating. I'm tolerating it through writing and releasing the tension.

And wtf is this person putting their own food in my space of the fridge? Just because I'm super organised with a manageable amount of veg doesn't mean someone else can invade my space.
When the other residents were still here, we were saying that if there's someone else's food in your place, you have the right to eat it... But since it's been less than a week since the new people moved in, I decided to put the food in the space where there's similar food. The food that was in my space was pastry and coke. There was the same package in the lower shelf and that shelf was full-ish but there was still space to put both pastry and coke so I stuffed it in there. I think it's important to correct this kind of annoying habits earlier than keeping silent and bitch about it on my blog.

I seriously hope these fucking people learn how to live or at least look after the kitchen properly. I now realize how well previous people got along. I miss them so much. :(

Wednesday, 28 September 2011

LGBTQ group

Meet and greet was on Tuesday. I went 45 mins late because I had to register before going there. When I finally went, they had changed the room... Double booking. Typical British error. Anyway, it took about 10 mins to find the real room. When I finally got there, they were reading out jokes. I didn't get most of them. I couldn't get into other conversations either. Everyone was talking and I found it impossible to cut in, if that's the right expression. There were moments where I thought I could say something but my mouth refused to move. Then some of us moved over to the bar and talked some more. I just went for the sake of going. I didn't talk then either. Not the best impression. But at least I smiled.

Today was Arts and crafts lunch. This was more relaxed. I talked a little bit. It was easier to say something because we were drawing. Distraction helps a lot. There were more people than yesterday. But I talked with some people who came yesterday because the table was long. There was a guy who looked just like Adam Lambert. Nice. I think I saw someone who is FTM but I didn't talk to them. I think I did better than yesterday. :)

Also, I might make an appointment with my doctor for depression. I'm finding that having fun during the day makes me depressed at night. He should be able to help.

Monday, 26 September 2011

Does this look genuine?



It was Meiko's birthday yesterday.

I posted on facebook that I had make cupcakes on friday like I posted on this blog a few days ago. Meiko and Miny said they want to eat them. So they came over yesterday at two. I baked specially for them but because I knew from facebook that it was Meiko's birthday, I decorated with silver decoration "MEIKO :)" on each cake. I had bought the decoratioon at Tesco earlier that day.
The letters turned out wonkey but she liked it so I was glad. We all had a great time... At least I hope so. :)

Why I had fun on freshers week day 1 without doing much.

Because I was with someone all the time.
I was with Ivan, Justin, Ryan, (ex-classmates) Miny, Meiko, and Sarah(new friend Miny brought along because she is Korean... same as Miny). It felt like I actually had friends. Like, real friends that I hang out with. Although it's only one day. I don'tknow, maybe we'll stick together tomorrow too. But there's a LGBTQ meet and greet tomorrow so I'll have to detach for a couple of hours. I'm looking forward to it though. Nervous and excited.

The people who moved in to the rooms around me... Well, the first impression isn't so good. There's 1 Chinese guy (ADD-ish), 1 Chinese girl (shy 16 yr old)(They are both very nice), 1 Azerbaijani guy (seemed super shy but the big guy, who turned out to be his cousin, protected him.), 1 Russian girl (looks anorexicly skinny. Doesn't smile or talk unless I talked to her. Came with mum.). There's supposed to be someone next to me but haven't met them yet.
I'm realizing how the previous residents were very sociable. I miss them. :/

Saturday, 24 September 2011

I'm not.

I got a friend request on facebook from my former class mate the other day. We'd been in the same class for 3 years and I don't remember having a single conversation with him. I accepted his request anyway. According to his profile, he was the one who went to Kyoto University. One of the few students who made the teacher happy. I'm obviously not one of them. But I am extremely relieved that I came to Exeter. Looking at the photos on his facebook, I can see how his life hasn't changed. Like going to university is a mere extent of high school.

He made me think back of my life at high school. How the teacher told me the class was better off without me. How he wanted to me to go the other classes but decided not to remove me because he was considerate of my "situation." How he wanted me to go to a Japanese university because I had been receiving scholarships for three years that I didn't even apply to. How he and the other class teacher talked about absolutely nothing for hours after school. How he was hallucinatory about being a good English teacher when he very clearly wasn't.

I absolutely despise every single aspect of my teacher. Now that I'm getting (or rather, going to get) REAL education, I should be the one laughing now. But I'm not. I'm just living a happy life. And I don't feel sorry for the guy who went to Kyoto university. Nor to another guy who is studying an extra year to get into a decent university. I don't have any negative feelings towards any of my former classmates. They all did what they were expected/wanted/had to do. It's their life. It's just that the teacher should get a fucking life. Or not. He may have looked after me for 2 years, but I'm not thankful for him. At all. And I hope I don't ever hear his voice, talk to him, or hear what he's up to. Because I couldn't care less.

Friday, 23 September 2011


I just finished baking 15 cupcakes (3 of which are already consumed.) It's the first time to bake something from scratch without my mum's help. I went to Poundland to get some cupcake cups. There was a choice of buying 75 paper cups or 6 silicone ones. I'm glad I chose the silicone ones because I don't have to worry about using it all up. But I had to bake 3 times. 6, 6, and then 3.
I'm enjoying cooking a lot. I've been buying new foods like curry powder and tortillas. And when I went to my grandma's house, I brought back a book about cupcakes and 3 pretty old cookbooks by Delia Smith. I'm looking forward to cooking new dishes!! I used to love watching Delia Smith's cookery programs on TV when I was little with my mum. :)

Wednesday, 21 September 2011


During this 2 week holiday, I've been trying to try new food. Today, I went and bought tortillas. I also wanted to buy oyster but I couldn't find any at Tesco or M&S. I know that oysters aren't for vegetarians but I read that "oysters are naturally low in fat, sodium, and calories. They are also a very good source of high quality protein, polyunsaturated fatty acids, and iron." I think I'll try other small shops on Saturday because I'm going to my grandma's tomorrow. :)

Saturday, 17 September 2011


I won't get into a relationship with someone who I can't hold a conversation with. I mean, I asked Nancy how long it took to come back from Scotland and she replied "a week."

I think I'm safe until someone else tries something crazy. :/

Sunday, 11 September 2011

End of course "Black N White" PARTY!!!!

On Friday night, it was the Black n White party (because we had to wear black, white or both).
 It took me quite a while to "get into the groove" but after 2 hours of drinking orange juice and watching others dance, I joined in too. I genuinely had a great time.
 ...Hence the big smile on my face. :-) This is K, who is one of the Summer Support Team. They work for INTO and looks after us during the summer.

If you remember Nancy, who I walked around St. Ives with, well, I kind of have a relationship problem with her.

On Thursday, all my flatmates and some of their friends got together in our kitchen to have dinner. I cooked spaghetti tomato sauce and garlic bread. There was quite a lot of food.
Anyway, Summer (who used to live in the opposite room) insisted me on sitting next to Nancy and get closer to each other. I had been getting to vibe that Summer and some of the others were trying to get us closer.

A few week earlier, when I went to the kitchen, there was Summer, Yang, and Nancy. They were talking Chinese (obviously, because they are all Chinese.) and as I walked in, Summer and Yang giggled. I sort of knew that they were talking about me. When I asked "what what what???" they didn't tell me anything. But I could tell that something was up with Nancy.

After Thursday's party when most people had gone back, the same members were left in the kitchen; Summer, Yang, Nancy and me. Summer insisted on Nancy and I take a photo together. We did. We talked. Summer eventually told me that Nancy likes me. even though Nancy was with us. I said I like her too. As a friend.  After I went back to my room, I felt bad for Nancy because it wasn't her that told me this. I know how it feels to be dumped without even telling the person yourself. I think everyone has the right to disclose their feelings when THEY feel comfortable. Not be forced.
So I sent a message to Nancy on facebook that I didn't mean to hurt her. She replied that it was ok. I said let's just be friends. She said yes.
I thought that was sorted.

*sighs* How wrong was I?

During the black and white party, Nancy brought up the topic.
She said, "I don't want you to be embarrassed."
Me: "no I'm not. It's cool."
Nancy: "But I like you."
Me: "I like you too."

I mean, I totally meant it like as a friend. What else was I supposed to say?

When we were coming home from the black n white party, she asked me if she could leave her laptop and other personal stuff in my room while she goes to Scotland for a week. Of course I said yes. Her  two black bags and a folder are in my closet.

So that's the story.

And how is this a problem?

It's because:
  1.  I don't want to be in a relationship.
  2. All my trans friends say it's a bad idea to lie.
  3. I don't want another heartbreak; for her and myself.
  4. Her English isn't that good.
  5. She seems like a person who likes to spend money on clothes, judging from her fashion.
  6. I'm not interested in her.
  7. She likes spicy food.
I talked to my MTF friend Hannah about this and she said,
"grab her boobs kiss her neck and ferociously make out with her.
just kidding. dont take my advice. its horrible. LOL
is she attractive?"

Shane "yeah i guess she is.
i'm not looking for relationships.
but at the same time, i think i have to take whoever comes.
I mean, i don't really deserve to choose, do i?"

Hannah "lol meh. Not really. I cant choose either."

Shane "and i'm not out.... so i don't want to lie to her."

Hannah "No one knows your trans!?!?!"

Shane "i told one girl because she told me she's gay.
other than her, i don't think anyone knows."

Hannah "Oh.
Well thats gotta be nerve racking."

Shane "yup"

Hannah "and yeah it might be a good idea to avoid relationships unless your prepared to tell people.
it can really upset people if they feel like you lied to them."

Shane "your right...
how sad."

Hannah "or you could just not have sex."

Shane "but that's kind of lying too.
i think i'll just give her a hug and get it over with."

Hannah "how will that get it over with?"

Shane "is that a bad idea?
is it misleading??"

Hannah "I just dont understand what you think hugging her will do.
what are you trying to accomplish by hugging her

Shane "idk i just want to hug someone other than my pillow.
i haven't hugged anyone for over 2 months and now i'm missing it.
so i thought i can hug her."

Hannah "well if she likesss youu
the she will think you like herrrr
then she will want to dateeee
then your stuck in a relationship"

Shane "fuuuuuuuuu--------"

Hannah "lol"

Shane "so what am i supposed to do?? grab her boobs and kiss her passionately? lol"

Hannah "LMFAO Idk"

Shane "what would you want a guy to do when you know he knows that you like him?"

Hannah "I would want him to like me back"

Shane "i like her as a friend. and i'll probably fall madly in love with her if i keep thinking about this. because that's always the case. and then i get out of control. because love is fucking crazyyyy"

I love Hannah. She always gets me. I hope I will get to meet her in person someday. She lives in Oregon...

By the last sentence, I meant, once I fall in love with someone, I get uncontrollably in love. Like, I can't stop myself from doing really creepy things. Which is probably one of the reasons my ex dumped me. She got creeped out.

ANYWAY! I hope this situation will go away in a good way very soon.