Sometimes I feel I'm walking on thin ice. A small failure makes my confidence disappear suddenly. It feels like I'm crap at everything and I'm worthless. I felt like that the other day but luckily recovered quite quickly which is rare for me.
The first class of physics and I couldn't understand a thing of what the teacher was saying. I could only stare at the black board and think "wtf am I going to do... I can't fail now." I knew it was because of the lack of studying because I didn't study AT ALL during spring break. Although I had to study, I couldn't get myself together to do it. However, the next day I thought it's not late to do it all from the start. I'm not under the stress the others are having (it's stressful for me too but that's tiny compared to the others) and there aren't tests coming up yet. So today I made it an All Physics Day. I'm concentrating on Wave which we are doing now. I'm glad to say I've understood the textbook and all I have to do now is practise. It sounds like a small step but I feel I've made a big progress so far.
I am also having trouble with maths and chemistry too but I will try my best to understand.
I need have more self-confidence. At school, friends tell me I'm good at English when I'm down. It sounds to me like I'm shit without English which is completely true so it doesn't cheer me up. It must be easier to be confident if you have something you're good at. Out of school, I'm not good at anything. Knowing this, my confidence is like ice that can break any time.