Tuesday, 6 July 2010

Although With Much Effort, Nothing Came Out

This is kind of a response to Sensei’s comment on my last post "When an Invisible Tranny Becomes Visible." I have time to write because I'm free from the end of term test! Yey! :)

Take a look at this clip from The L Word Season 3 episode 9. Kit talks about Max's transition.


video



My last post may have misled you to the idea that:

a) I want to be a man for social benefits.
b) I want to transition because of what other people think of me.

Both of these are not true.


If a person wants to go through a transition for the reason a), that person is a fake tranny. Those fake trannies would not be diagnosed as Gender Identity Disorder (the medical term for transgender) because it clearly says in DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) that "This cross-gender identification must not merely be a desire for any perceived cultural advantages of being the other sex."

Besides, there will be more disadvantages to be a tranny because of the emotional and financial burden. Also, I don’t want to be prejudice but being a woman is obviously better. Duh!! If I had the choice, I would choose being a woman! : P


As for b)….
Transpeople have the need to transition because they feel uncomfortable with their bodies. Like Max said, trannies don't feel "whole" in their original bodies.

If you're a cisgender person (not a tranny), just imagine. How would you feel if you had the physical characteristics of the opposite sex?

Maybe you will think "Uuuuummmm... That's sexy...." or maybe think "Ew! That's gross!" The truth is, the latter describes what you will feel more accurately. I mean, trannies wouldn’t exist if they were comfortable about it! You will feel the same.



Hmmm… Explaining b) isn’t going too well….



Yeah, come to think about it, what other people think actually does matter.
We have to communicate with people when living a social life and most people will recognize you as either male or female and treat you like one.
If nobody considers other people’s gender, there wouldn’t be any problems. However, in real life, men and women have a different pronoun, they use different toilets, they wear different uniforms etc. The work sometimes differs too. Men are expected to act “manly.” Women are expected to act “feminine.” It must have been worse in the past but society still thinks that way.
It might be the same even if you are cisgendered but for transpeople, the stress is more intense.

That’s the problem of what other people think of me. It’s not just that.

Even when I’m alone, I’m irritated by my chest not being flat and my voice being high. It’s not about what others think of me, but what I think of myself.

The stress comes from our bodies and from society.
So we transition to solve both problems.
After we transition, we will feel comfortable both physically and socially. People will start treating you the way you want to be treated.


*What I mean by “Transition” is
1) Being treated the way I want to be.
2) Changing physically (hormones and surgery)

Transpeople have different comfort zones and some just need 1) and some need as much as hormones and some need it “all the way.” Some fortunate trannies are fine with living “part-time.”



I tried my best to describe what it’s like to be trans but I don’t think I succeeded.

One short and silly and probably inaccurate metaphor…

You are wearing your shoes the wrong way round.
Everyone is treating you like a silly person.
Your feet are uncomfortable.

OK that one was really wierd... :-(

3 comments:

  1. You actually explained it quite well, thank you for sharing.

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  2. Good explanation of a complicated issue. I can't offer any cridible advice on what to do because I have never been in your situation. I think it might be like riding the wrong motorcycle....it doesn't really fit you and it's too slow and people look at you strangely when you ride by. You can't wait to get the right motorcycle so you can feel better and relax.
    It might be a stupid comparison but I am kinda of stupid so it works for me! I also want a new, faster motorcycle!

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  3. Thanks! I'm glad it was helpful!! :-)

    ReplyDelete