Saturday 26 June 2010

When An Invisible Tranny Becomes Visible

I've been watching transition documentary vids on YouTube by many people (mostly female to male) and it's surprising to see that they look so un-tranny. I mean, you wouldn't realize that they are trans if you see them walking down the street. This is because they are on hormones (Testosterone). If you listen to them talk before T and after, the change is CLEAR.

The Voice Change Is DRASTIC.

People who aren't on T sounds like a woman's voice trying to sound like man, you know? I've written in my previous post that I'm very conscious about my voice and I guess I sound like a woman trying to sound manly too. It takes a lot of effort to keep my voice low and it's very tiring to have to think about the pitch before every time I speak. If I say something without thing about my voice and controlling it, it comes out as a complete female voice which is very embarrassing.
I think I don't look too feminine if I don't speak except for the fact that my hips are quite curvy. I'm an INvisible Tranny.

Once I speak, I become a Visible Tranny.

The other day, when I was talking with my friends when waiting for the school bus to leave school, a friend of the friend I was talking to came up to us. My friend asked him out of the blue if he thought that I was a girl or a boy. He instantly said "Girl, obviously" so I asked him why he thought so and he said "your voice is high."

Yeah. I agree with you.

I wasn't offended both by my friend for asking the question or this guy for being too honest. I guess I've grown up. :-)

Anyway, voice is one of the things that makes a tranny visible.

Another thing is my name.

My really name is not Shane and I don't write my on school papers unless it's REALLY necessary.

My real name means "Love child" in Japanese which is a nice name but it screams out that I'm not really a guy. I envy unisex names like Hikaru (meaning light) and Yuuki (has various meanings).

"Shane" is a unisex name and sounds good and it's the name of my favorite character on The L Word. The Shane on The L Word is a very considerate person and the kind of person who I want to be.

As I won the speech contest the other day, my name will be on the school newspaper. I fear that when people who just know my surname and don't know that I'm trans will be confused.

There's a girl in the sports class who says she's my fan since I did a presentation in front of the whole year (which is like 600 students) last year. I don't see her often but every time she sees me, she waves at me and I wave back. She even said "I love youuuuuu!!!!!!" the other day which was very sweet.
I don't know what will think when she sees my name in the newsletter.

3 comments:

  1. Hmmmm....I didn't think you were a girl even after talking to you and I don't think many others would in everyday life. Someone who knows you really well might notice but not many. You might be more sensitive to how people look at you but most people would not know that you are a girl.
    I think wanting to be a man is really highly over-rated. We get nothing but shit all the time and as you get older most of the important/entertaining parts seem to wear out but the desire remains. We are designed to reproduce at a young age and then the party is over. It's all downhill after that.
    I think lesbians probably are the next evolutionary step since they can technically reproduce now without needing a man. Plus they can now do everything a man can do and usually do it better or at least without all the shouting, cursing, moaning and groaning which usually accompanies any DIY project I undertake.
    The need to define yourself as one particular gender is now as out of date as is defining yourself by nationality. Categories are for small minds; they are too restrictive. Just be yourself and enjoy all its possibilities.

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  2. It seems like you and I would get along quite well. I don't look like society's version of 'homosexual', but when I talk, you immediatley tell. A lot of my 'I'm still trying to decide if I want to be his friend because he's gay' friends get mad when I talk like a girl. xD

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  3. This is excellent and I totally agree! :D Let's chat more, yes?

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