Tuesday, 7 February 2012

I don't want to seek attention so i guess this is the best place to bitch.

so today i didn't speak at all. like yesterday. i didn't even meet anyone yesterday. the day before, i only spoke to my parents on skype. I've been depressed since last Tuesday. don't know what the cause was but I've been unable to crawl back up again. I went to a slow food event tonight which I'd signed up for quite a while ago. I wouldn't have gone if i hadn't paid in advance. I didn't talk much there either. Lauren, who is one of the members, told me to "mingle" and tried to make me smile but i couldn't. Its like i don't exist in class as well. The psychology class don't interest me either. They started like 2 weeks ago and its depressing to think I'm going to study it for the next 3 years. then again, i don7t have anything else that i can do instead. i want to cut but i'm afraid i don't be able to stop for 5months again.
fuck this im going to bed.


  1. Hmmmm....psychology seems like an interesting field that could be used in many different areas. I considered it at one time but I was not very good at science. Why not just take any class that you feel like and forget about their stupid rules. That's what I did. I made my own curriculum and studied whatever looked interesting in no particular order until I found something I liked and people I liked. Fuck the system. Do what you want to do. Travel.

  2. There's nothing that interests me. That's the problem.

  3. Yo, I've been through the cutting thing too, and it is so not worth it. Dude, be antisocial if it gets you through the day. That's what I do. But I have an excuse cuz I have a mood disorder and sociaphobia. Seriously man, the world needs people like you to find the interesting things that no one else sees. Eat Pocky. That's what makes me feel better

    1. Thanks. I'll take your advice and be antisocial until this depression goes away.